Friday, November 11, 2005

Home is Where the...

still toying with the idea of going home tomorrow. i know amy really wants to see me, but I can not even begin to explain the level of tired I am feeling. and i'm sick--bad cold and the beginnings of a bronichitus, temperature. i've overextended myself with work and i need to do some thinking and organizing this weekend. i also want to clean my fish tank.

i've actually had a pretty bad week and today i was not mentally stable. i've had mood swings all over the place.

so my food choice of the week has been onion rings, french fries and salami.

i watched Rushmore. if you like that unexplainable sense of humor from Owen Wilson and Wes Anderson, then def. rent this. it made me laugh. Bill Murray is a funny guy. the only movie i can not stand with him tho' is Groundhog's Day.

i wanted to go to Rick and Emily's on Wednesday to watch LOST, but I just couldn't make it...i just couldn't drag myself over there and pretend i was ok when my face was swollen from tears. Wednesday was week two. two whole weeks, and i still feel like i'm watching the world go by me. i'm trying to make out Thank You notes, but they just don't seem to be happening fast enough. i can't seem to find anyone's address. everything i need is at my parent's house--and i just can't go back there yet.

the person that's really freaking me out is my Dad. he's the angriest person i've ever seen, and we've been fighting. he keeps saying that i'm treating him like my mother by telling him what to do. that hasn't helped me at all. this week i felt like i lost both of my parents, and i've been hanging by a thread. he apologized to me today tho'. i guess it's made me feel better, but he's not the same person that raised me. i'll be straight, he's being a stupid bastard, and he wants to purge all remnants of my mother right away.

1 comment:

Kimberlee A. Dworczyk said...

I know you want to make everything right, and try to do what's best, but sweetie, please take care of yourself. You said it perfect, sounds like you have overextended yourself.. and that's the last thing you need to do is be sick on top of all this - and overwhelmed. You are doing great, girl. Just wonderful.
Ooohhh. fried food and salami, eh? interesting choice. Hey - whatev floats ya boat - right? Lately, I've been craving D.Donuts blueberry iced coffee. Just makes my day.
OMG - Jason loves Groundhog's Day. He subjects me to it whenever it is on the movie channels, and despite my love for B.Murray, enough already. Y"know? geez.
As for the thank you notes, remember what you told me for the wedding notes? Girllll- you have time. Take it. Relax and just do what's ab-necessary. Prioritize. If it means you have to wait till you are ready to go back to get the stuff you need - oh well- so be it. People understand Annie. Don't worry.

I'm actually not surprised by your Dad, but at the same time, I am. It's weird. Everyone handles things differently, but I'm sorry how it has to effect you thru all this.
You are one strong bizneotch - just remember that.